PCBS

Quote o' the day- "That's a shiny Abe Lincoln you've got there." - Me
"Let's get a picture with Shiny Abe." - Jenna Myrick
"Wow. You guys like taking random pictures." - Ruth Overholser



Shiny Abe Lincoln



Hebrews 10! It rocks!



me



Jenna drinking her hot chocolate



me again

What happened to my pictures of Ruth and Leah? They aren't there...sad day.

Oh, and I forgot to post pictures of Alec's "Welcome Home I'm About to Leave Again" Party.
Here they are:



Jenshka, Lerah and Alec



Me and Josh



Me and Todd



Wow. That's like, blackmail for everybody. I'm talented.



Me and Nicole. Love the hair.



Me and Scott Beasley. I haven't seen his hair...him...for a while.



One of my favorite people ever, Lerah Ashburn



Melinda and Nicole



"Which of these girls uses Suave extra-shiny? If you can't tell, why should we..."

Yay! Pictures of everybody! Okay, gonna go do homework now. Tomorrow's the last day of class!!! Halleluia!

Arrivederci!

"Happy Winter Solstice" as Chris Would Say

Diane reminded me with a funny video today about the P.C. takeover of Christmas, and I found us some carols on a website that we can safely sing at the youth caroling party:


I'm Dreaming of Many-Hued Winter Season


Rudolph, the Reindeer with the Facial Appendage of a Different Color


Oh, Come all ye Faithful, Agnostics and Atheists


Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer (but it was Grandma's fault for being in the space set aside for woodland creatures to run free without interference from human beings)


Frosty the Snowperson of An Indistinguishable Gender


Joy to the *World (*The word world includes all nations, including Iraq, North Korea and Iran)


We Wish You a Merry December (and a happy new calendar page for those that observe the years according to other religions or cultures)


I'm Getting Nothin' for Christmas (because my parents think the holiday is overcommercialized and co-opted from pagans and only capitalist pigs buy presents)


Little Drummer Person


You Must Have Had a Terrible Childhood, Mr. Grinch


Supreme Being of Your Choice Rest Ye Merry Gentlepeople


Oh, Christmas Tree (we will guard you from the lumber industry)


Up on the House/Apartment/Cardboard box Top


All I Want For Christmas is My Two Front Teeth (but because we don't have nationalized health care for everyone, my parents can't afford dental coverage)

Let it Snow (but it won't because of global warming)

I Saw My Parent/Step Parent/Guardian/Caretaker Kissing Santa Claus


And lastly, let's all practice the 12 Days of our Winter Holiday:


On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed midwinter festival, my Significant Other in a consenting adult, monogamous relationship gave to me:

TWELVE males reclaiming their inner warrior through ritual drumming,

ELEVEN pipers piping (plus the 18-member pit orchestra made up of members in good standing of the Musicians Equity Union as called for in their union contract even though they will not be asked to play a note),

TEN melanin deprived testosterone-poisoned scions of the patriarchal ruling class system leaping,

NINE persons engaged in rhythmic self-expression,

EIGHT economically disadvantaged female persons stealing milk-products from enslaved Bovine-Americans,

SEVEN endangered swans swimming on federally protected wetlands,

SIX enslaved Fowl-Americans producing stolen non-human animal products,

FIVE golden symbols of culturally sanctioned enforced domestic incarceration,

(NOTE: after members of the Animal Liberation Front threatened to throw red paint at my computer, the calling birds, French hens and partridge have been reintroduced to their native habitat. To avoid further Animal-American enslavement, the remaining gift package has been revised.)

FOUR hours of recorded whale songs

THREE deconstructionist poets

TWO Sierra Club calendars printed on recycled processed tree carcasses and...

ONE Spotted Owl activist chained to an old-growth pear tree.


Yay! Happy Holidays everyone...Arrivederci.

I just want to let you all know...

I just got back from class and my professor said sentences ending with "yeah?" at least 6 times today. He would make statements like, "And you remember hearing this, yeah?" Or "We discussed the Golden Age of Poland, yeah?". Stuff like that. So there.
I'm still waiting to hear how many of y'all do it. Results are better on my xanga. I've gotten a lot of "yeahs" to "yeah?". Not so many on the blog...oh well.
Arrivederci.

Quotes O'the Day

"*loud gasp. I may buy a rubix cube instead of this light saber!" - Brandon Myrick
"And so, anyway... wait. Stop. I can't talk and walk at the same time." - Jenna Myrick

So I went to Walmart by myself tonight. Partly because I am a loser, partly because I convinced myself that I needed a break from my homework, partly because I didn't make anything for the party we're having in our Slavic Culture class tomorrow and I needed to buy something and partly because I needed to do some Christmas shopping. But it sort of turned into a party at the ghetto Walmart because Jenna and Brandon were there Christmas shopping (who've decided that they can pass for twins-



I think they could definitely pass for twins.) and so I was shopping with them and then we found David, who was buying weight-loss smoothies for Anna...yeah, we didn't really understand that one...it's 'cause she got new wires on her braces he said. But that still doesn't explain the "weight-loss" thing. Anyway, then we saw Jesse who was buying a $1.00 stuffed animal for some girl because he told her he'd buy her a present but his budget was $3.00. I guess he made budget. So it was pretty exciting and I spent far more time than I intended playing around at Walmart. So now it's almost 1:00 and I still have gotta do all that homework...good plan, Calyn. Arrivederci!

Oh, I need to conduct a poll. How many of you occasionally make a statement and then put "Yeah?" at the end of it? For example, "You're going to Bekah's birthday party Friday, yeah?" Or, "You have a shirt like that, yeah?" Because Todd seems to think that I'm the only one who says that, but I think far more people say it than he thinks. He just needs to get out more. You don't have to say it all the time, but if you do sometimes, let me know. Thanks.

I'm not the only one with a lousy self portrait.
Arrivederci.

Could it Be?

VS
I guess we'll just have to wait and find out...

Who just won the ACC Championship? Oh, that's right. We did.

"Decemberween is (almost) here!"

With Decemberween fast approaching, I thought I might take a moment to get everyone in the Decemberween spirit.

Here's what the homestarrunner Wikipedia says about Decemberween:

"Decemberween is a holiday celebrated by the people of Free Country, USA, 55 days after Halloween, on December 25th. It bears many similarities to Christmas with colorful lights and garlands and the giving of presents, but with some obvious differences. Decemberween Food has some unique variations on more recognizable cuisine. Instead of turkeys, they eat bunnies (much to Marzipan's chagrin). The origins of the holidays are complicated, involving at least one Angel:

"Homestar, I don't think those are your lines..."
Dr. Christmas (who looks a bit like Santa Claus):

2 Kobe Bryants:

Kobe 1

and a sailor named Archibald:

as explained in A Decemberween Pageant. It can also be celebrated in July, time permitting."



Decemberween Food is traditionally prepared and consumed around the festive time of Decemberween. They can be prepared from scratch or purchased in large family sized cans.

Gravied Yams
This consists of Yams that have been whipped into an unappetizing gravy.

Stuffinged Ham
This is made from a large country ham, diced and used as a stuffing, then served separately from what it was stuffed into. It also looks like gravy. It is very uncouth to bogart it.

Roast Bunny
It is unclear if Roast Bunny is a common Decemberween dish or if it is enjoyed only by The King of Town. The practice seems to be widespread enough for it to be mentioned in the Decemberween Song and for Marzipan to create protest signs against it.

If you do nothing else this Decemberween, make sure to watch the Teen Girl Squad Decemberween Special as presented by Strong Bad and
The Decemberween Children's Book also written by Strongbad.
Happy Decemberween to everyone! "Decemberween is here. Decemberween is here-today..."
Arrivederci!

Guow

Lerah made me a sack lunch! She is amazing! I can't wait to find out what is inside tomorrow. :0) Oh, but, I'm sorry, Lerah, Joe Lyons is borrowing our digital camera, so I can't take pictures. :0( Sorry.
Ruth made the best cookies tonight. She is pretty much amazing. I love Ruth Overholser.
I have so much homework, so I need to go.
Spoki Noki everyone. Arrivederci!

This Wasn't Quite as Great As I Thought It Would Be

I thought I'd get some exciting answers from this. Especially since I haven't slept for a long time. Not so much. But ya'll should try it. It's word association. It's fun.

Server :: Applebee's
Charlotte :: Church
Jackson :: Browne
Resentment :: Boiling
Controlling :: Freak
Intense :: Like the Circus
November :: December
Donkey :: Democrat
Weave :: Hair
Satisfies :: Thirsty
Colorblind :: DC Talk (I have no idea why I thought of that one. Maybe cause of the Colored People song...)
Shallow :: Sand bar
Figment :: of your imagination
Eviction :: Notice
Composed :: Calm
Chill :: Bill (Phil, Will, Jill, Officer Hill...Yeeesssss. Chill, Bill!)
Girl :: Friend
California :: Dreamer
Bond :: james bond
Political :: correctness (Or as kenley would say...pcbs...)
Concentration :: I HATE that game!
Fish :: Fry
Lunacy :: Bin
Red :: Head
Imply :: lawyer
Recognize :: him
Commercial :: Real Estate (I've been hanging out at Kenley's too much)
Stricken :: illness
Roadtrip :: Carli
Honey :: Bear
Flanders :: That horrible movie me and lori watched one time that looked like it was going to be some sweet family movie. It was so boring.
Vampire :: GARLIC. Gross.
Justice :: for all
Marine :: "The few. The proud..."
Protractor :: Circle
Rubber :: Tire
London :: Big Ben
Jerry :: Seinfeld
Foundation :: Cover Girl
Accidents :: Happen
Hometown :: country music
Natural :: blonde
Bombastic :: fantastic
Bachelor :: reality T.V.
Far away :: Tom Cruise (oh, that was "Far and Away..." Oh well. I still thought of it.)
Tony :: Jackson
Time: Warner
Stocking: Stuffer
Bye: bye miss american pie

Lori is home. I'm so happy. We didn't get home til 5:00 this morning. Yuck. But we got to go to lunch with Todd and Adam Elliot. Did you know that in nicaragua the word for cheap is "elbow?" And Tom Petty is from Gainsville. Or something like that. I guess I should know by now, huh Todd? That's what I learned today. Oh, and James can pogostick.
I am so excited. We all went to McDonalds tonight after we left Kenley's (yuck. not my favorite place, but some of my favorite people were there, so that made it okay. :0) and Lerah had folded up her paper bag her french fries came in and said, "Calyn, you could use this bag for a sack lunch. I'm gonna use it. Wait, you should take it to school tomorrow and pack yourself a sack lunch." I said, "Lerah, people don't really pack lunches in college." James said, "Joe Wade did. He always came to TCC with a sack lunch." But then, that doesn't really hold up because, well, TCC is more like 13th grade than college. (I can say that because I spent a couple years there. I'm not trying to knock on TCC. I loved it. Really. So don't send me mean comments.) Anyway, Lerah said, "Well, if I packed you a sack lunch would you take it to school?" I said, "Heck yes I would." I mean, how cool is that? Lerah packing your lunch. That's just awesome. Anyway, she took my order of what peanut butter I wanted (crunchy, of COURSE, right Tanya and Zhenya? :0) and then she said, "I'mma pack you a star crunch." I mean, isn't that just the epitome of a sack lunch? Star crunches.

Memories. Well, my computer is acting up, so I'm gonna go. Arrivederci!

LORI IS HOME!!!! HECK DA!

I feel like this is one of those annoying comedies where bad things keep happening to someone and it's supposed to be funny

Okay, now Lori didn't get on her flight to London so they are driving her and 7 other people to the London Heathrow airport where she will (supposedly) fly to Montreal and arrive in Atlanta at 10:00 p.m. Yeah, sure.

Okay, cross your fingers. 14 hours. Everybody better pray that Lori makes it tomorrow. Otherwise I may curl up in a ball and die. So pray hard.

Ya'll, I'm gonna cry. Lori's stuck in Amsterdam. :0(

I Get To See Lori in 12 Hours and 38 Minutes!!!! AHHHH!!!!!

Paul Fenstermaker

Bah Humbug, Pauls!

Mewwy Chwistmas Evewyone

Unlike most of the American population, this I slept through all of the great deals that were supposedly going on this morning. I prefer not to be beat up in a parking lot over an X-box or to stand in line for 3 hours to save $3 on a pair of jeans. To each his own, I suppose. Instead Chris, Cameron and I did our best to entertain ourselves til about 3 o'clock this morning and that was pretty fun. Then we slept all this morning. Yesterday I put up my Christmas tree, which, as any of you who know me know that is a very big deal. I helped Dad put up Christmas lights outside too. And then me and Diane, Lerah and Crystal went and took over Kenley's house and baked cupcakes. I came home and me and Chris and Cam played cards til, like, 2:30 this morning. Cam was busy playing World of Warcraft, as usual, and me and Chris were like, "Cameron, come play with the 3-D people for a while." He said, "3-D people? I gave up on them a long time ago." We convinced him to play anyway.
But, enough of that. Let's get back to my Christmas tree. I mean, it's pretty much the most beautiful thing ever. I took some photos for you all so that you too can share in it's beauty.



This is it in the light. Six feet of absolutely stunning evergreeness.



But this is where it really shines. You can see its red and white glow outside my window in the dark. I mean, really people, is there any need to visit the Rockefeller tree this year? You can just come to my house.



I mean, look at how excited Cameron is? Doesn't this face just scream "excitement?"







Mewwy Chwistmas Evewyone! Arrivederci!

Wow, this was a thanksgiving cartoon earlier. It must automatically change it. Amazing.

Once Upon a Thanksgiving

Alright, here's my Thanksgiving story for Lori:

A long time ago in a land far, far away (9 hours on U.S. Air) there was a land called England. Before it became famous for double-decker busses, policemen with funny hats, and fish and chips England was the center of the Anglican church. Now, the Anglican church had some issues and there were some people who thought that the Anglican church was too close to the Catholic church and replacing a King for a Pope wasn't a good switch. (However, the King beat the Pope in a wrestling match, and being men of good sportsmanship, the leaders of England felt it was only fair to let the King rule the church. Maybe they should have let God rule it. Then they wouldn't have had that problem.) Anyway, there were those who believed that the Bible was the sole source of authority and the Anglican church wasn't working the way the church was supposed to operate. These people became known as "separatists" and many of them decided to move to Holland to form a church and escape persecution from England.
These Pilgrims, as they are now called, jumped on a boat and settled themselves in Holland and lived there for 12 years. Now, although the Pilgrims really liked Holland with their pretty tulips and elaborate system of keeping all their inhabitants from drowning by a system of canals and dikes and levees: (
)

maybe it was because Holland was too windy with all their windmills or maybe it was because the Pilgrims were always confused about whether they were from "Holland" or "The Netherlands" or why the naitonality of "Dutch" had nothing to do with either of those words or maybe (and most probably) it was the Pilgrims were concerned about their children growing up in a more immoral place than they wanted and they were afraid their culture would get mixed up into Dutch culture, after 12 years the Pilgrims decided to say "Tot ziens " (goodbye) to Holland and get a charter from the the wrestling champion and join the Virginia company to go to America where they would create a "city on a hill." (A rock would have to do.)
So about 100 pilgrims boarded a boat called the "Mayflower" which was departed neither in May, nor with any flowers. However, the name "Mayflower" did provide the punchline to a popular children's joke in America that annoys young and old alike: "If April showers bring May flowers, what do may flowers bring? Pilgrims." Yes. Thank you.
The Pilgrims had a long, hard journey aboard the Mayflower. The boat rocked back and forth and lots of them got sea sick. Many of them had forgotten their toothbrushes and their cellphones didn't get service out in the middle of the Atlantic, so they sacrificed a lot to get there. Some of them also died along the way. But 65 days later, on December 20th, 1620, the Pilgrims landed at Plymouth Rock in present day Massachusettes. The Pilgrims were in bad shape because it was December and over half of them died that winter. But that next year native American Indians helped the Pilgrims grow food and they had plenty for winter.

One of these Indians was named Squanto and I remember that because I had to do a report on him in elementary school and I had to paint him in art class. Governor William Bradford decided that there should be a "day of thanksgiving" that fall to thank God for all he had provided them with.
He said that it was a day to "listen to ye pastor and render thanksgiving to ye Almighty God for all His blessings." (You can say that with an English accent or add more "ye"'s and "thou's" to it to make it sound more Shakespearean.)
So the Indians and Pilgrims had a big party and ate so much food they probably got sick, but those that didn't had a dance, dance marathon behind the barn and turned on some Toby Mac. The first chicken dance was actually the turkey dance and the Pilgrims invented that too. And then at the very end some little guy named Tom or something said, "God bless us every one." He walked with kind of a limp because he had danced too hard to "let's get this party started." But everybody still thought he was really cute and his dad got to keep his job.
So that's about it.

This thanksgiving let's remember to count our blessings and realize that ham, corn on the cob, sweet potatoes, pumpkin pie and cranberry sauce could not and were not on the menu in 1621. But we'll eat them anyway.


Arrivederci!

Quotes o' the day

"He was injured. Injured bad." - our new favorite commerical. Email Sarah for details.
"Calyn! They restocked!" - Rachel, upon discovering that after taking 6 MoneyClip magazines to get Chick-Fil-A coupons she went back inside and saw the lady refilling the container.
"Mom, why do we have Doctor Pepper? Nobody likes Dr. Pepper in our house?" -me
Mom- "Micah does." (come on, Calyn. Get with the program.)
Arrivederci!

The 1:26 News

Sorry guys, I've been really slacking lately. I'm very sorry for not keeping you all up to date. Maybe it's because I haven't gotten home til after 1:00 every night this week...nah.

Good evening (morning) and welcome to the 1:26 news. I'm your host, Calyn Reber reporting for channel 3 and a 1/3. In our big story of the evening- Saran Wrap. It's not just for your mother's leftovers. Tonight in a house on the north east side teenagers wrapped each other in saran wrap and did the worm on carpet. In an unrelated story, Alec Waller is in town. We have uncovered the real reason he decided to attend Covenant College in Georgia. He said, "When I went to check it out, we were watching this movie and these two guys came in totally naked and just sat down on the floor. I was like, wow, that's awesome. That's one of the main reasons I decided to go to Covenant." He denounced rumors, however, that he has in fact joined a nudist colony. We can only thank God for that.
Kenley Stringer has bought the haunted house that was the source of many a story of my friend Stephanie and I when we were in elementary school. It seems that little children were locked in one of the bedrooms in the past. It's kinda sketchy. There's scratch marks all over the door and nothing but a deadbolt on the inside. However, Monday night was work night at the Cumberland house. Almost the entire inside was painted and Jenna and I even signed our names in paint on the concrete floor that will soon be covered with wood. Our names are forever sketched in the haunted house. Six garbage bags of insulation were also removed from the 2nd bedroom. When he said "fixer-upper" he wasn't kiddin' anybody.
Todd Sapp went on a lunch date recently... You can check out his blog for details.
Here comes the best part of the news. For those of us who are fans of the Lion King soundtrack (I'm thinking of the loud, vocal fans...namely, me, Diane, Shannon and Jenna) I've found the real words and translation of the "do you wanna-wanna-na banana..wanna-go-to-a-nevada..."
Check it out:

Nants ingonyama bagithi Baba [Here comes a lion, Father]
Sithi uhm ingonyama [Oh yes, it's a lion]
Nants ingonyama bagithi baba
Sithi uhhmm ingonyama
Ingonyama Siyo Nqoba [We're going to conquer]
Ingonyama Ingonyama nengw' enamabala [A lion and a leopard come to this open place]

And then the really low-voice-lady starts singing "From the day we arrive on the planet..." I'm not really sure what that's supposed to mean. Honestly it doesn't really sound all that great in English, but you know. It's still awesome. And then right after that in big letters it says:



Yeeeessss. What a great movie. I mean, really, what beats Lion King? Maybe Aladdin and Beauty and the Beast. But that's about it.
So I was driving down Tennessee street yesterday and I saw this bumper sticker that really made me laugh. I'm not sure if I shoulda laughed at it, but it was funny. It said, "Dyslexic satan worshippers sell their souls to Santa."
Okay, well, I'm meeting Alec and Daniel at some bagel place tomorrow morning, so I need to go. Some unforunate people still have class tomorrow until 5...meh.
Arrivederci!

8!!!!!

The Day of Birthdays

Happy Birthday to Shannon, Mr. Robbin and Rachel!!!!
Y'all are pretty special, all sharing the same birthday and all. I thought I'd tell you some other exciting things that happened on your birthday:
Well, You share a birthday with:
RuPaul, Howard Dean, Danny DeVito, Gordon Lightfoot, Soichiro Honda (founded Honda), and King Louis XIII of France. (Okay...so maybe that wasn't all that exciting.)

1800 - The United States Capitol building in Washington, DC holds its first session of the U.S. Congress
1869- Suez Canal opens
1871 - The National Rifle Association is granted a charter by the state of New York.
1968 - NBC preempts the final 1:05 minutes of a very close NFL football match between the New York Jets and the Oakland Raiders with Heidi, prompting an outrage amongst sport fans. (I guess the superbowl used to be in November?)
1973 - Watergate scandal: In Orlando, Florida, US President Richard Nixon tells 400 Associated Press managing editors "I am not a crook."
1989 - Cold War: Velvet Revolution begins - In Czechoslovakia a student demonstration in Prague is quelled by riot police. This sparks an uprising aimed at overthrowing the communist government (it succeeds on December 29).
2003 - Arnold Schwarzenegger is inaugurated Governor of California.

Apparently November was just a very popular month to be born. So many birthdays.
Happy Birthday, Sveta! It's already the 18th in Ukraine. :0)
Arrivederci!

Okay, funny story. So I accidently posted this post on Lori's blog... because I'm confused like that. I really don't know how I logged in as her on blogger, that was weird. Okay, well, here's my post on my own blog. Or if you think it's especially exceptional, you can go view it on Lori's blog too.

Miss Cindy sent me these pictures and they are awesome. Maybe you've all seen them before, I don't know, but they made me laugh.



Chances are, if you're there, yesyouare.



Even at that price I don't think it's a good deal. :0) (I don't hate...)



I think usually the first two are reversed, but maybe things are different in Maine.



Well, gees, I guess they just wanna be confusing.



I guess they don't tax us enough. They gotta start renting out the jails too.



Apparently this is at a crocodile park in St. Lucia. My question is, what caused them to put up this sign????



Poor McDonald's. They're McConfused.



Don't let my dad anywhere near this one.



The fact that there's two of them makes this all the more sad.



I don't think this one needs any explanation...
Arrivederci!

Things I've Learned This Week

1. Pink can look good on pretty much anybody.

2. Books with the word "Death" in the title are generally not books that I get excited about reading.

3. Geometry is not my best subject.

4. Computer technology is not my best subject.

5. I'm not really sure what is my best subject...

6. Creative voicemails make life more fun.

7. Seinfeld is about the best show ever.

8. Good grammar has gone the way of the dinosaur.

9. Spelling is following close behind.

10. Carli is pretty much the coolest ever.

11. Dysfunctional skits are really fun.

12. Christmas is coming up real quick.

13. Lori is coming home real quick.

14. There are only 3 weeks of school left.

15. My sun roof works!

16. My mom is the best.

17. Rachel and Lerah were just made to be best friends.

18. Sleeping on the roof might not be the best idea.

19. The Bible is the best place to get advice.

20. I can use "best" in a lot of sentences.

Arrivederci!

13!!!