Wednesday, September 07, 2005

*Place Title Here

When I'm president a few things in this country will change.

1. People biking on Old Bainbridge Road will have the right to attach a hammer to their bicycles and smash the side mirrors of those who decide they'd rather hit you than inch over a mere foot into a lane that has no cars in it.

2. Relatives will not be allowed to have apartments overlooking your parking spot in college with which to waste their lives standing at the window waiting for you to pull up so they can complain to you about your other relatives.

3. Florida State University will no longer hire inept employees who cannot handle something as simple as a Bright Futures Scholarship.

4. The City of Tallahassee will not be allowed to contruct giant wooden telephone polls in the middle of the sidewalks in Frenchtown. The sidewalk must be yea big so that the handlebars of the bicycle don't hit the telephone poll and knock the poor cyclist down. Not that this has happened to me...

5. Either Diet Vanilla Coke, Coke Zero, or Diet Cherry Pepsi will be in all fountatin machines.

6. No school in the mornings. Mornings are for sleeping. Not for being at school.

Got an update from my favorite person in the world today. I'll post it on my blog as soon as I can open it. It's a Word document, and I sorta don't have Microsoft Word. I know, how sad is that? Word Perfect is meh. Not a fan.
Talk to y'all later! Arrivederci!

6 comments:

Todd G Sapp said...

you can probably open it with word pad. start/accesories/wordpad

and by the way...when you become president outlaw Poker...and be careful. If there is a natural disastor you will be blamed for it. You will be personalbly responsible for every detail that goes wrong. Even if the govenor and Mayor, a week and a half into the crisis, are still not on the same page as to whether to evacuate the city or not, you will be blamed for every person that dies. It's a tough job. But you can handle it.

Calyn said...

Hey, that worked, Todd! Thanks! You should start a school. The "Todd Sapp School For Kids Who Can't Use Computers Good and Want to Learn To Do Other Things Good Too." :0)

Jenshka said...

I'm pretty sure that I would like you as a president. Pretty sure...

Aaron B said...

hahahahahahahahahahahaha...Calyn..nice....hahahahahaha

Anonymous said...

i'd vote for you

TX said...

If I were a President:
I would like to put "burn"-machines on the streets.
And have network of restourants named:
"Calyn Inc. Pelmeni"
+prohabit any porno on tv and any alcohol and tobaco advertisements.